Slumbering Tsar #4: Spicy Sadness

29 Jun

Things aren’t looking too hot for the newest jalapeno in the party, Spicy Salsa. After the party was betrayed by their orc guides promising “treasure waiting to be picked up” in the Desolation and lost Jatanga and Lorparin Grareak, the party returned to the Camp. –GM

8th day of Gozran, 4716 AR


The Camp was not the ideal bed and breakfast, but it seemed to have a lot of problems that promised adventure.

I arrived to the Camp with little money and less excitement. The Camp was small, dirty, and hostile looking.  Not the ideal bed and breakfast, but it seemed to have a lot of problems that promised adventure.

Soon after I arrived, I found another person in search of an adventure: Nostog Honderfjom. We put up a sign together advertising our skill and interest to fight. I went to the local pub alongside my new companion to have a drink.  However he turned out to be the most annoying sentient being I had ever had the misfortune to meet. I left in search of less hormonal companionship and quickly found a group of adventurers who were in need of a few fighting arms, as their old ones had died off. Unfortunately, the pubescent Viking I mentioned earlier joined us.

The adventurers told me about their recent fight with the Furious Fourteen, and the casualties that had happened thus far. They told me of their goal: to find the holy vaporizer. I concluded that they were foolish and told them that I would help gladly in whatever task they performed, but that I am not going to sacrifice myself for a miniature smoke machine.

We proceeded to search the town further, which suited me perfectly since I had only just gotten there.  We found two people, a hag alchemist named Mama Grim, and a morbid hobgoblin cleric named Father Death. They were (if not a bit sinister) at least not hostile. Finding nothing of great importance, we walked west and found a mohrg that looked like it didn’t want to be there, but more importantly didn’t seem to want us to be there either. It was exhilarating to feel another creature crippling at my blow.

After, that we left the mohrg and continued on our journey.  We also met a few dwarves, which was uneventful. (They are excavating to find the bones of their great ancestor, King Kroma, who fell in the battle against Tsar. –GM) 

The talk was dull, the battles short and easy, the leaders childish and the quest pointless. I am generally disappointed in the adventure I have chosen to join.

– Spicy Salsa (Athos)


Aeorbeck Wolfsbane – human cleric of Iomedae 8
Cuorok – human (kellid) beast-rider cavalier 6

Nostog Honderfjom – human (ulfen) armored-hulk barbarian 6
Ralph – goblin fighter 6

Spicy Salsa – human monk 6
Vape Naesh – elven wizard 5 / fighter 1 / eldritch knight 2

Jatanga – human red mantis assassin 1 / swashbuckler 5
Lorparin Grareak – half-elven hunter 6

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Posted by on June 29, 2016 in Campaign, Slumbering Tsar


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3 responses to “Slumbering Tsar #4: Spicy Sadness

  1. Nate

    July 1, 2016 at 5:02 pm

    Um. I’m not in search of an adventure. I’m in search of something that will kill me. Nostog is chronically depressed. What do you mean by “hormonal companionship”?


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